...the attending hospitalist keeps everyone up for a FULL HOUR discussing the differential diagnosis of hyponatremia at 3:30 AM. 30 hour shifts are the whole reason I stayed away from IM, at least one of them. I just had to laugh, in order to avoid gouging my own eyes out with my pen which was running out of ink anyway since we have to handwrite our dictations.
My other favorite:
Me: the patient in ED bed 9 with the acute asthma exacerbation looks like she'll avoid intubation thanks to continuous nebs and 5 over 10 biPAP plus mag and epi times three from EMS, but she's still tachypnic in the high thirties and speaking in 1-2 word sentences, just FYI.
Admitting doc: Did you get a complete review of systems and family history?
Me: Well, I kinda was worried about treating her and she's, again, only speaking in 1-2 word sentences.
Admitting: just go back and do a complete 12-point review when you're done. Make sure to dictate the ROS by system.
These med folks do some good work and I sure like to admit to them, but jeez...